Tag Archive : CBD

I proudly accept the title of crazy!

Heyyyyy y’all!

I’ve been so ready to update y’all about all the happenings on this end. But I didn’t know where to start because it’s soooo much. But if I keep pondering on a perfect topic, I’ll never be able to write. So excuse me but I’m just winging it this evening a bit more than usual. LOL

The biggest change is I’m taking a break from work. Too be 100% honest, I was overwhelmed, constantly anxious, no longer happy, constantly in fear of loosing employment and my performance was poor. I was getting trouble at work, having schools constantly call me about my kids tardiness and absences. I was so overwhelmed with working full time, trying to manage all the kids needs, the household, be a wife, show up as a friend, good sibling etc. I was showing up for everyone but myself and still felt guilty for not doing enough. When I tell you my mind starting to tell me the most awful and viscous lies.

I’m sure you’ve heard, “feeling like you’re not good enough”. But when the feeling also becomes a reoccurring thought or voice in your head, there is a pain that becomes so intense, you’d try anything to stop that pain. When that pain becomes intense, it can feel like you’re so low that the only direction you can go is down. It’s like your energy, purpose, enjoyment of life, and soul has been separated from your body. In fact for me the emptiness became physically painful.

Because people don’t want to be deemed crazy they don’t tell the truth. My truth is I wanted the mental pain to stop so bad that I’d rather not be here. I felt my kids would be better of without me and deserved a better mother. I started accusing my husband of the craziest things, even if I didn’t say it out loud. Like moving my keys to make me seem like I’m going crazy. Then I would go into thoughts of feeling like a burden. The cycle is vicious!

But please don’t be ashamed. Many people don’t share because of the shame as been classified as crazy. I’ve been call crazy all my life. And I’m crazy enough to share my testimony while getting help. Help looks different for everyone. Help can be medication, talk therapy, coping skills, or even hospitalization. Getting help doesn’t make you crazy. It helps you take control of your life and get back to living the life you enjoy!

I can go into many details about my recent experiences. But to sum it up; I had days of constant crying, panic attacks, self deletion thoughts/fantasies, depression to the point I would sleep for 12 hours at a time. No bathroom break needed. I’m sharing this because their are people that are ashamed, or embarrassed to say these things. So I’ll be your voice and know you’re not alone. You’re not crazy! Bipolar disorder, depression, schizophrenia and other mental health disorders are chemical abnormalities in the brain. Not a choice or result of poor coping with life.

And another thing. Please stop saying there is nothing you can do for a person in a mental health crisis. Especially a friend or family member. You can admit you don’t know how to respond or what to say but help the person get the help. NAMI had great resources. But don’t hand someone a pamphlet and leave it at that. If a person is in a crisis, do you really think they’ll stop and look at the pamphlet. Help make some calls to those resources. Ask the person in crisis if you would like to stay on the phone for support and just listen in.

If someone does choose to self deletion it never is anyone else’s fault. But you always have people that feel guilty and go over the what if’s when it’s too late.

Please see NAMI contact info below.


Call the NAMI HelpLine at 800-950-6264 or chat with us M-F, 10 a.m. – 10 p.m., ET.


In a crisis, text “NAMI” to 741741 for 24/7, confidential, free crisis counseling.

Cannabis vs. Neuropathy

Did you know we ALL have an endocannabinoid system. It’s present and active whether we use cannabis or not. The endocannabinoid system is believed to impact cognitive and physical functions. Such as appetite, pain, motor learning and many other physical and cognitive processes.

During my chemotherapy treatment cannabis helped relieve my pain, specifically neuropathy of my fingers and toes. Neuropathy is a side effect of chemotherapy. The chemotherapy causes damage to the nerves which causes neuropathy. Neuropathy causes tingling, burning and pain like sensations. These sensations can be absent for weeks and suddenly hit you like a ton of bricks. This is also a very common symptom for people that live with diabetes. Constant high blood sugars also cause damage to the nerves. Neuropathy is not reversible and there is no cure. 7 1/2 years later and neuropathy still pops up too frequently for my comfort.

Although, I was so lucky to develop neuropathy. I’m also a living testimony of the true benefits of cannabis. I was able to manage my pain with cannabis and discontinue narcotics, muscle relaxers and pain blocking injections to my back (ouch!) . This was only possible with prayer, determination and cannabis.

However, seven years ago I didn’t know cannabis could manage my pain and neuropathy. I was terrified at the thought of smoking weed. In fact, I was afraid of burning myself trying smoke. I didn’t know the difference of Sativa (energy/focus) and Indica (sleep/relax). I was unaware of the true benefits and risks of using cannabis. I’ve experienced anxiety and even cannabis psychosis by using someone else’s cannabis that was not the right strain for me. Not a fun thing at all! Now I’ve done the research and even found products to make anyone’s smoking experience better.

Copy and paste http://www.pinkwheel420.com into new browser window or tab to view my cool, fashionable and fun finds. Also, see a few of our most popular items down below!

And if you’d like to try cannabis ALWAYS start with CBD for anxiety and pain. There are cannabis strains that help manage blood sugars, high blood pressure, you name the issue, and I can find a strain that can help manage most chronic illnesses.

Please note Cannabis is NOT a cure for chronic illness, nor should it be used in place of your prescription medications. ALWAYS consult with your doctor to make sure cannabis is safe for you!

If you’d like more info on cannabis and how to find the right strain for you email me at busybrirn@gmail.com


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